No Dr. King, your daughter can’t go to Funtown

In elementary schools all over this great country, students are forced to read Martin Luther King’s “Letter from a Birmingham Jail.”  This communique to a white clergyman from the sainted (at least according to the Episcopalian Church) Dr. King has been praised as the equal of divine writ by many Christian denominations.

One of the most sentimental, tear jerking passages comes when Dr. King speaks eloquently about the evils of segregation, saying:

Character doesn’t matter in Black-Run America; only Color

you suddenly find your tongue twisted and your speech stammering as you seek to explain to your six year old daughter why she can’t go to the public amusement park that has just been advertised on television, and see tears welling up in her eyes when she is told that Funtown is closed to colored children, and see ominous clouds of inferiority beginning to form in her little mental sky.

Who could possibly argue with such passionate words?  Who could possibly dispute the simple justice of allowing a young girl to enter an amusement park?

The answer of course is any non black person who has tried to bring his own children to an amusement park.  
Once places of affordable, innocent entertainment for American families, they have now degenerated into holding pens for feral minorities who can’t keep themselves from cursing, molesting, or simply attacking each other or anyone else that gets in their way.  Where families could once bring their children to enjoy simple pleasures like an ice cream cone or a ride on the log flume, theme parks are now just another one of those places that normal Americans can no longer go, just like beaches or urban schools.  

 Much like the public buses that the sainted Dr. King also integrated for us, normal Americans who set foot in these forbidden zones will be confronted by howling, animalistic mobs that will attack them and steal their possessions while screaming racial slurs.  Unless they have an Epic Beard Man to defend them, their cries will be ignored and any media outlet that points out the hate crime will itself be smeared as racist.  

Theme parks are just the latest thing that Americans can simply no longer enjoy.  They can dramatically increase their prices to try to keep out what Dale Peterson called the “thugs and criminals” but that just leads to the forces of political correctness having special “ethnic days” which lead to the same kind of chaos as a peace festival.  They can try to enforce decorum on their newly diversified workforces but that just leads to lawsuits.  They can hire lots of security, but that leads to increased costs and them being driven out of business or more lawsuits if they do their jobs. 

So, instead, we get what we saw at Alabama Adventure yesterday.  Alabama Adventure is a water park built largely through the funding that the African-American mayor of Birmingham Larry Langford raised through municipal bond issues.  The park was called Visionland, but predictably failed within four years and had to be rescued through a private company that renamed it Alabama Adventure.  

 Larry Langford himself followed in the footsteps of other great black mayors such as Marion Barry, Kwame Kilpatrick, and Sharpe James by being arrested for corruption and sent to jail.  Actually, he was just following in the footsteps of the first black mayor of Birmingham, Richard Arrington, who was also arrested and sent to prison for refusing to disclose records during a corruption investigation.  He eventually was cleared of further charges by making enough accusations of racism against the federal government and making sure he could get a jury of Birmingham blacks.

The now reborn Alabama Adventure was shut down recently because of what the media tells us is a “near riot.”  Needless to say, it is not mentioned who is actually behind the near riot, but we are just told that it simply occurred, the same way a tornado or a hurricane might just happen.  In the same way that we know who are the “youths” behind car burnings in Paris or a “flash mob” in Philadelphia, Americans do not need to be told what is the explanation for this mysterious riot.  Once the six year old daughter of Dr. King becomes a group of the sixteen year old sons of daughters of other African-Americans, family entertainment, civilized conduct, or even basic public safety become impossible. 

And of course, it’s not just Alabama Adventure. 

It’s also Six Flags New Jersey.

And Disneyland.

And Sea World.

And Six Flags Texas.

And Wave Country in Nashville.

And everywhere else black “youths” gather in large numbers.

Why was Funtown closed to colored children Dr. King?  Well, unfortunately, we didn’t have YouTube back then so we couldn’t show you.  But considering your own private behavior of whoring, boozing, cursing, and embezzling, we think you knew even then.  Your conduct, and the conduct of your people, might be saintly by the standards of today’s Episcopalian Church, but it’s not up to the standards of everyday behavior that normal Americans expect even while they are on vacation. 

That’s why cities throughout the country are forced to adopt curfew laws and private businesses enact dress codes

Even though you used fraud to obtain your doctorate, we’ll use the honorific for convenience’s sake.  Dr. King, your daughter couldn’t go to Funtown because white Southerners knew that once it was integrated, your people would ruin it. 

And you did.  Now, decent people of any race can no longer enjoy it.  Of course, it still has to be closed even to your people once in a while because you can’t keep from attacking each other.  And eventually, just like shopping malls, public parks, and bike sharing programs, even your people won’t be able to use it.  Mall envy exists for a reason.

That’s the saddest thing about this.  Even as progressives and “antifa” and civil rights activists shriek about their victories over “racism,” they don’t really win.  Schools today are just as segregated as they were in the 1960’s.  Test scores never come closer to being equal.  The crime rate has been reduced only by putting record numbers of blacks are in jail.  The only way one can even create a black middle class is by shoveling huge amounts of government money at them and massively lowering standards, and that won’t be sustainable for much longer.  And while Americans mouth the required pieties to avoid trouble, every single one moves as far away from the “bad schools” and “urban crime” just as quick as they can load up their electric car with an Obama ’08 sticker on it and lead happy lives far away from diversity and tolerance.   

What happened to the American Dream?  It was replaced by Dr. King’s Dream.  And the worst possible thing happened.  It came true.  
I’d like to take my kid to Funtown too, Dr. King.  But unfortunately, the only one left that is safe for children is in the Whitopia I moved to to escape from your dream.  And I’m really sorry, but your daughter isn’t allowed to come – and my tongue won’t be twisted when I tell her why.  




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